1.
Why do I cringe at the sound of my own voice —a collage by Rizwan Javaid
From the Community
When I read the title of this Substack post (👇🏽), it immediately made me laugh out loud because it resonated so deeply. I'm sure I'm not the only one. But, the reactivity I experience in hearing my own voice and seeing myself on video has been so extreme that it has, in the past, driven me to utter breakdown.
When the narcissistic self-hate is in full flow, I truly wonder why people let me talk to them. It makes me want to apologise to everyone I've ever spoken to. And I'm surprised people don't heckle me and throw rotten tomatoes as I walk down the street. Why am I allowed to exist?! It's all rather melodramatic, but nowadays it has less of a hold on my attention. If I were to get over myself, I can see that nobody cares enough about my existence/non-existence to go through the effort of banning my speaking or throwing fruit. So relax.
's collage is a great representation of this experience of extreme 'cringe' - it's all a bit loud, disorientating, and you can't really see straight. But if you just stopped for a minute to take a breath and look - it's just exactly what it is. Some noise, coming out of your mouth, that makeup words. There are feelings here and there, and there may be an overarching mood or colour. But that's really all there is.2.
Clockmaker with Bad Eyes — a poem by C.D. Wright
From the Library
Clockmaker with Bad Eyes
I close the shop at six. Welcome wind,
weekend with two suns, night with a travel book,
the dog-eared sheets of a bed
I will not see again.
I not of time, lost in time
learned from watches—
a second is a killing thing.
Live your life. Your eyes go. Take your body
out for walks along the waters
of a cold and loco planet.
Love whatever flows. Cooking smoke, woman’s blood,
tears. Do you hear what I’m telling you?
- C.D. Wright
Reflecting on this notion of 'getting over oneself', I was reminded of this poem.
I don't need to do anything or be anything. I'm just a person alive on this planet, with everything that comes with being a person. And I can live my life, and love whatever flows.
Do you hear what I'm telling you?
3.
A Midsummer Creative Retreat — a prompt from Anna Brones
From the Substack Community
I love a prompt or a mini challenge to inspire creative action, especially when I'm needing to break out of a period of stagnation. Routine is great and essential for me, but when it's all I have... well, it's boring.
To join this online retreat with
, subscribe to her Substack 👇🏽.It kicks off on Wednesday June 21st and will run through Sunday June 25th. You will get one newsletter a day, each one with a little prompt or reflection. Something to ponder in your imaginary island space. A little time to breathe, a little time for creativity, a little time for wonder.
👨👧👦 HAPPY FATHER’S DAY 👨👧👦
I've really enjoyed reading about the stories and snippets of fatherhood in the Substack community. So a shout out to a few writers (not an exhaustive list) - I've been moved by some of their sharing of being a dad in the various posts I've read over time.
Happy father's day!
Thanks for sharing. It was good to hear you experienced similar thoughts when hearing your own voice. It can feel like a trap we can’t get out of but hearing how others have tackled it gives hope. ✊🏼
Thank you.